TRICK OR TREAT

More Pictures!!

She does not like tummy time!

After a long day of shopping!

One more attempt at tummy time!

A visit to our new house!

Syndey & Mocha

Look at that face!!

A Beautiful Thing

Daddy was home yesterday and helped mommy out a lot!! Mommy was able to get herself pulled together from the previous day of hell!! Sydney still is not taking a bottle, not sure what happened there. Up until this point, she had been using one certain bottle. We will keep trying.

Moving on to more important stuff...I never knew a smile could be so wonderful! Sydney's smile just opens my heart in a way I have never experienced. Sometimes I will be caught up in the moment of something unimportant when Sydney will catch my eye and as I look at her, she gives me this toothless smile from ear to ear and my whole world just stops and I feel this rush of joy run through me!! It's so beautiful and such a reminder of what a beautiful gift she is. I love her so much!

Last night she slept for 8.5 hours in her crib!!! I haven't felt this rested in months!!

I have to go, I can hear her striking up a conversation with her mobile, I don't want to miss the latest gossip!!

Day From Hell

Have you ever had one of those days you wish you could just redo or just plain erase? Yesterday was that day for me!

As I mentioned a couple days ago, Greg was out of town with Jordan for a college tour so Sydney and I were alone. Our morning started as usual, everything seemed fine...I pumped some breast milk so Sydney and I could go to our Tempe store so I could get some things done for Greg. I needed the bottle because I knew we would be gone for more than 2 hours (Sydney still eats about every two hours). I got us both ready and in the car and started the car and pulled out of the garage and Sydney started to have a melt down. So, I pulled back into the garage and tried to feed her the bottle. Everything went downhill from there! She refused the bottle (which she had also done earlier in the week). To make a VERY long story short, after butting heads with each other for 2 hours, she never did take her bottle or any other bottle for that matter. And, I couldn't breast feed her because I had just pumped and didn't have any milk left for her to eat!!! I tried 5 different nipples...all of which she refused! During all of the crying and screaming and trying different bottles, 2 wine glasses fell from the cabinet and shattered all over the counter tops and the floor, cutting my foot. Imagine this if you can, Sydney in her pink chair on the table screaming at the top of her lungs (choking and coughing due to the intensity) wine glasses shattering to the floor, me trying to wipe them up and cutting my foot and now getting blood all over the floor, Sydney still screaming, me pouring the breast milk from bottle to bottle praying she would latch on, which she never did, Ziggy howling because of Sydney's crying, Zoey barking because Ziggy is howling, and finally, Mommy crying!!! I felt like such a failure!

The day never did turn around for us...it was the worst day so far.

Early evening, Jamie called me and I was able to vent. She really helped me out mentally, thank you Jamie!!! I just have so many mixed emotions in regards to breastfeeding. It's something I am not going to give up but it is so hard for someone with my personality and lifestyle. I am not a stay home type of gal and I am not a breast feed in public gal. Sydney wants to be fed every two hours which doesn't leave time for us to be out and about since it takes so much time to get from one place to another. Not being able to get out is really taking a toll on my emotional being. So, today we are going to work on the whole bottle thing again. Greg is home so he will be the one to offer her some different types of nipples and see if we can figure this out!! Wish us luck!

Sleeping Update!

I understand if some of you are tired of me talking so much about sleeping, but let me remind those of you have have already been through the newborn thing....Sleep is essential to whether we have a good day or bad day at the Wade residence.

Good news...today will be a fantastic day!! The new swaddle wrap I found yesterday worked well last night! Sydney went to bed at 9pm and didn't wake until 4am! After eating and rocking, she then slept until 7:30am. Thank you God! Due to lack of sleep, my brain was fried yesterday and I could barely carry a conversation!! Greg and I were talking last night about Jordan having to write college essays and I couldn't even remember what my Master's thesis was about! I spent a whole semester researching and writing it and I couldn't even remember what it was about due to lack of sleep!! Oofta!

Today and tomorrow, Sydney and I are on our own. Greg and Jordan left early this morning to go visit Santa Barbara college. The soccer coach has expressed much interest in Jordan playing for his team. We will see what they have to offer him financially. Another college we are working closely with right now is Brown! They are very interested in him and have offered a nice monetary opportunity. We are waiting to get more information from the soccer coach. Keep you fingers crossed!

Below are a couple pictures of Sydney and her BFF Addison. Addison is 9 days younger than Sydney. This gives you a good idea on how big Sydney is...

More Updates

The transition to the crib and P.J.'s went awesome!!!! It was so easy!!

YAW RIGHT!!!!

We were up every two hours last night. Seriously, Sydney's legs were making a bicycling motion all night long!!! We thought at some point she would tire herself out and sleep soundly...wishful thinking. That girl burned a lot of calories last night! Needless to say, Daddy and Mommy are very tired today!! At 3am, Greg finally reswaddled her and she slept until 5am at which time Mommy finally gave up and brought her into bed with us and she slept on my chest (big no-no I know!!). So, today I am off to buy a larger swaddle that will help her transition better into her big girl P.J.'s. Wish us luck!!!!

Updates

I am so sorry to those of you whom I have not gotten back to. Life with Sydney is still unpredictable...which can be very trying for someone like me who is a planner!! Please know I am doing my best and will try to get to everyone soon!

Sydney is just soooo smart. Every time I take her to stroller strides, all of the moms are just amazed by how alert she is to her surroundings. She has learned to pull forward to lean herself up, which means she now has to be buckled in to everything. She is also talking up a storm now, especially to her mobile in her bedroom. She also is doing this thing were she sucks in her bottom lip and smiles...once again, very cute!

Yesterday we tried something new with her nap (thanks for the suggestion Jessica W.)! I have a pak-n-play downstairs with a changing table. For her afternoon nap, I placed her on her tummy with a blanket under her tilting her some for her nap. It worked!!! She slept for 2 hours and she was right down by me so I could constantly check her to make sure she was breathing well. I actually got to do a workout while she slept. Up until yesterday, the only way she would take this long of a nap was to sleep on her tummy on my chest. Hopefully this continues to work.

We will be making the big switch to P.J.'s (instead of the swaddling) and crib tonight. She is just way to long to be in her bassinet another night and she has totally outgrown her swaddler! We will let you know how that works out. I wonder if I will get any sleep tonight!

By the way, I forgot to let you all know. During her doctors appointment last week she weighed in at 13 pounds and 24 1/2 inches tall!! She is in the 97th percentile for both!!

New Discoveries

Sydney had her 2 month immunization shots yesterday. It was awful!! She slept most of the day and we had another 7 straight hours of sleep last night. Today, she was a whole different little girl. She has been talking up a storm all day long. It's so amazing to hear your child's voice. She has a different expression for each sound...it's soooo cute!

Along with all of the talking, she continues to recognize how amazing her hand is! She stares at it and then puts it in her mouth and then stares at it again. After awhile of staring and licking her hand, she gets very excited and will then try to stick her whole fist in her mouth. Once she realizes it will not fit, she screams at her hand! She has also starting blinking her eyes a lot today. Everything she does is sooo cute and just amazes me. I know, I know, I probably need to get out more!! I did go hiking tonight before it got too dark. As I was reaching the top of the mountain, I saw a beautiful sunset over the mountains. I wish I could have shared it with you all.

Season of Change

It's finally cooled off here and the weather has been amazing...Arizona fall has arrived! When I think of fall, I think of change. And when I think of change, I think of how much my life has changed this last year...the last couple months in particular. This morning, as Sydney is sleeping in her swing, I got to thinking of all the things that have/or are currently changing, for me.

1. I have always been a worrier, that will not change; however, I have noticed a change in the things that I tend to worry about. I am not as concerned about "me" anymore. Several times now I have gone without a shower, have stayed in my PJ's all day, have gone to the store in a hat and sweats, etc. Along with all of this, I have not kept up with the current trends in clothing and I have totally let my hair go. All of these things just don't matter enough to me right now to waste energy worrying about them. Instead, I now worry about things like...is Sydney getting enough to eat, am I eating the right things for her nutrition, am I being a good Mommy, and am I doing anything wrong, etc. I worry about how many hours of sleep I am going to get tonight and what are the important tasks that need to be done today while she sleeps. I worry about my husband and all of the additional responsibilities he has had to take on while I stay home and care for Sydney. The list goes on and on but the theme is...I have become a much less selfish person. I seem to be worrying more about the people I love. I think that is a good thing in this situation.

2. Something else that has changed in my life...well, in the past, I always needed an event to look forward to just so I could get through all of the uneventful, boring, work days. Whether it be a trip to Mexico, a trip to Minnesota or a concert, I would put all of my focus on the event just so I had something to look forward to. Now, the things I look forward to all revolve around Sydney...her first smile, her first giggle, walks in the park, weekends when Greg has off work and we can do things has a family, our first trip to Minnesota when I can introduce our daughter to all of our family and friends. So many things to look forward to with our daughter. It's almost like life has just begun!

So, bring on the fall...change is good!

More Pictures

Sydney and I had quite a day yesterday. This coming Friday will be Greg & I's 5 year wedding anniversary (however, we started seeing each other in 1996)!! This last year has definitely been our best year so far!! To remember this, Sydney and I decided to get Daddy a very special gift...we got our picture taken together and framed it nicely for Daddy. We couldn't wait until Friday to give it to him because we were so excited, so we gave it to him this morning. Daddy was very happy and said it was the best gift ever!! The first picture is the one we went with and framed.

Now for the "quite a day" part...Sydney would not smile during our photo session. In fact, she had a total melt down! The rest of the day was downhill from there! It was definitely one of the longest days of my life! She fought sleep all day so she was very cranky! I finally got her down around 9pm last night. She did come around by sleeping until 4:45am! She went back to sleep after eating until 7am!

Yesterday, I bought her a mobile for her crib. I am going to slowly start making the transition from her bassinet to the crib because she is getting too big for the bassinet. She LOVES the mobile. There is lots of color and movement and calming music. She is completely mesmerized by it when I lay her in her crib. Hopefully that will last!

Lastly, this morning Lil Sydney was no longer a bobble head. She was holding her head up all on her own and turning it quickly from side to side as if she just discovered a new talent. It was very cute! Now, she is taking a quick cat nap in her swing (that's how I am able to get this post done)!

Priceless

A funny thing happened the other night and I can't believe I forgot to share it! As we were getting Sydney's bath ready, Greg decided to take her diaper off early and was holding her naked little bum while I was running the bath (I am sure you can see where this is going...). All of a sudden Greg started panicking so I looked over at him...Sydney was peeing all over him. I really didn't think she could pee that much!! It was all over him and the floor. We were both laughing so hard. All he could do was just hold her until she was done peeing. We then put her in the sink baby tub. I wish I had a picture of what his face looked like as she was peeing on him...priceless!!!

Yesterday was such a beautiful day that we decided to get out and about. We took Sydney to Oktoberfest...no, we didn't drink any German beer (although it did look delish.). We did however, eat some authentic German food and had the opportunity to listen to some good old fashioned polka music! We didn't stay long because Sydney started to fuss...guess she's not a fan!

To top off all of my German food, I went by myself to North Mountain to hike/exercise. A year and a half ago I was running this hill. Last night, I was not running the hill, however, I was able to walk it at a good pace. I have been walking/running this hill since I moved here in 1997. I have put in a lot of time thinking and clearing my head as I went up this hill. I guess you could say this hill has helped me process a lot in my head. I remember walking up this hill and dreaming about my wedding. I remember walking up this hill the day after I found out my mom had cancer. I remember walking up this hill after she died. I also remember walking up this hill after each of my miscarriages. Many tears have been cried at the top of this hill. Last nights hike was special because this time tears of joy were expressed. As I got to the top of the mountain I thought of my Sydney and my family. I felt very blessed (and sore from the climb)!!

Two Months!!!

We had our first restaurant experience last night. It was such a beautiful evening that we decided to pack up and we went to Desert Ridge Marketplace. An outside mall with entertainment and restaurants and shopping. We found a cute outside table at a Mediterranean restaurant and had dinner. Sydney was sleeping the whole time. Greg was nervous that she would wake up so he ate fast...very fast! I am not sure if he even tasted the food. I on the other hand, enjoyed every morsel! We then walked through the market place. Sydney slept until we walked past one of the bands playing. She obviously didn't like the music because she made some pretty funny grimacing faces and opened one eye!

Because we were out and about, we ended up putting Sydney to bed about an hour or so later than what she is used to. And to our surprise, she SLEPT ALL NIGHT LONG!!! She woke up at 5am. I fed her and we were back to sleep within a half hour. She woke up again at 6:30 and we again fed quick and she fell asleep again until I woke her up at 8am!! What a nice surprise!!!


Our little Sydney turned 2 months old this week!!! Here are some pictures!

Tummy Time

Mommy and Sydney Kissing

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!

Life with baby is getting a little easier each day. We are out and about almost everyday, now that it is starting to cool off some. Today was a big day...we started Stroller Strides. It's a stroller exercise class. Mommy works her butt off (literally) while Sydney kicks back and watches! I think I like her job better! I was pleasantly surprised at how hard the class was and at how exhausted I was. I am already sore! I also got the opportunity to meet some very motivating instructors and other mommies. I will definitely be sticking with this program 3 times a week.

Sydney is growing everyday! She is totally developing her own personality. I love doing silly things to make her smile. Her smile alone can turn a foul mood into pure joy! I will try to get some more pictures up this weekend. Can you believe she turns 2 months old this week!!

A Special Moment

For those of you who have been following my blog from the beginning, you might recall a post I wrote about my mother. One day at work, I got the journal out that I keep for Sydney and I was just about to write to her and explain why her middle name is Cathleen. Just as I started writing, a song came on the radio that was very special to my mother and I (Wind Beneath my Wings).

Any ways, I was once again emotionally touched by this song today. As I mentioned in the past, Sydney loves to listen to the 80's music channel on our TV and to dance with us. I had just put her in her Baby Bjorn and turned the station on and the song "Wind Beneath my Wings" came on. All of the hairs on my body went up and I instantly felt a connection to my mother. It was a very emotional moment for me to hear that song for the first time while holding my daughter. What made this moment even more wonderful was that Sydney kept turning her head up to look into my face. The cry baby I am, my poor Sydney's face got a little wet from my tears, but I don't think she minded. So many emotions I felt as we danced to this song. I felt an overwhelming sadness because I will never be able to share a physical bond between my mother, Sydney and myself. I also felt joy because I have a daughter whom I hope one day will feel as connected to me as I did to my mother. It's just amazing how much I experienced in one short song!

Holy Poop!!!

So yesterday early afternoon I was talking to Greg on the phone. Sydney was in her pink chair facing me and started another daily explosive poop. I was waiting for her to finish. I was mid sentence with Greg when I looked over at Sydney as saw that her poop was bubbling over the top of her diaper onto her belly and out through the sides all over her pink chair. I said in a state of panic to Greg, "Holy Poop" and quickly hung up!! How the heck was I going to get her from her chair to the changing table without getting poop all over everything, including myself, while at the same time, holding her hands out of the way from getting anymore poop on them? Oofta!!

Moving on...Sydney's body temp. is always very hot. I cannot put anything on her but a diaper during the day and even then she will get too hot and gets a little rash. All those cute little newborn outfits that I will never get to put on her!

Last night was a tough one again. Seems to be the pattern around here...a couple good nights and then a couple rough ones! She was up several times throughout the night. I finally had to wake Greg up around 2am so he could hold her while I ran downstairs to get some warm Gripe Water (it's a pain in the butt to do this at night because the Gripe Water has to be kept in the fridge and then I have to warm it before giving it to her). Any ways, I had Greg hold her while I served it to her. This is a long process because if you give her too much at once she chokes! And of course, she choked. I was so delirious from lack of sleep and panic due to the choking that I called Sydney "Zoey" (our dogs name)!! I know Greg will never let me forget that one as Sydney gets older!

Well, today is Greg's day off of work which means I have a little time to get things done! Have a good weekend.

Proud Mommy

It's still Wed., I just put Sydney to bed and had to write a quick note. She has been cooing and making noises for quite awhile now but today was really a turning point for her. She was really trying to talk to me. It was soooo cute!! She would make all of these silly expressions like she was trying to find the right words to say and then all of a sudden she would just explode with babble! I was so proud of her! It's just so amazing to watch her develop her knew skills.

Earlier today she had an explosive poop (Paul, I know you love the poop talk)! When she started her poop I left her be for a moment so she could finish. When I came back to her I about died...all she had on was a diaper and she pooped so much that it somehow splashed up onto her chest and shoulder, just missing her face. Thank gosh Jordan was home. I called up to him to quickly bring me some wipes so the poop didn't get anywhere else. When I asked him to wipe the splashes off her chest and arm while I held her down, I thought he was going to have a panic attack!! He was very helpful!

Updates

(Monday) I am going to attempt to start an entry and see if I can actually finish it in one setting...

Sydney is in her swing right now. I am attempting to get her to take a nap. She was very kind to her Mommy this morning and we were able to take a nap together. It was much needed since she has been keeping us awake much of the nights the last few days. I am not sure what is going on with her, I think it's gas or stomach disturbances but it's hard to tell. She is ALWAYS really gassy during late night feedings and first thing in the mornings. The gas drops are not really an option because they constipate her which only adds to the problem...

interruption number one...she is already crying...post to be continued...

(Monday night) Okay, I am back. I just put Sydney down to bed for the night. I am attempting to put her to bed earlier tonight and gave her some Gripe Water to relax her tummy. We will see if that works!

(Wednesday)! Wow, Wed. already! We are going to go purchase a baby monitor today. I want to try a new routine with Sydney and try to get her to take her naps in her bed during the day. Currently, the only way she will take a long nap is if we hold her on our chests. Although extremely cute, this gets difficult because I can't do anything...like go to the bathroom!! Her bedroom is upstairs so I really need a monitor if I am going to have her sleep up there by herself. I have to admit, this decision is difficult because when she is asleep on my chest I feel so connected to her. Watching her sleep brings on such powerful emotions to me. All of the emotional turmoil we went through to have our lil' Sydney was all worth it.

She was sooo cute during her 4am feeding this morning. She was in a playful mood and kept looking up at me during her feeding and smiling really big, gums and all!! Of course I just had to interrupt her feeding and play with her...who could resist that cute face!

She is doing much better with tummy time and is getting much stronger. Her legs are VERY strong! She now understands what "SO BIG" means and if you say it to her during play time, she will lift her arms and smile. Greg and I wait eagerly for her first giggle. At this point she does this cute little giggle when she first falls asleep but she has yet to do it when she is awake!

She went to her first soccer game on Sat. Daddy was already waiting for us at the game when Sydney and I arrived. Of course, proud daddy had already announced to everyone that his daughter was coming to the game so the parents where quite eager to meet her. Daddy held her the whole second half and then it got too warm so we had to leave. She cried (screamed) all the way home!

Alright, well she is waking up again and crying. I will just post this already!