Happy Birthday Mom

For the past 4 years, December 28th has always been a particularly difficult day for me...it's my Mother's birthday. I never really know what to do with myself. I talk quietly to my Mother and will sing Happy Birthday to her several times throughout the day. I usually feel pretty lonely and somewhat empty. Today, I still feel all of these things; however, as you might imagine, I don't feel quite so low because I have Sydney with me.

Greg mentioned to me the other day about a book (I think it was a book he was talking abou) any ways, the "book" was about answering the question, "If you could spend one more day with a loved one whom has passed, what would you do"? So, I've been thinking about that today and this is what I have come up with...

I would want to spend one last day with my Mother. She would wake up at my house and wake me up by singing a song she used to sing to me when I was little:

"It's time to wake up,
it's time to wake up,
it's time to wake up in the morning!"

As I opened my eyes she would give me that unforgettable smile of hers and she would embrace me. I would then introduce her to her granddaughter and watch her hold and interact with Sydney. I would then ask my Mom what she wanted to do with the remainder of our time together and that's what we would do. As long as we were together and able to hug and hold hands and watch her kiss my daughter, that's really all I would want. No long drawn out conversations of "why". Really the only question I would have for her is to know if she is finally at peace. I really couldn't tell you how I would want to end our day, because I wouldn't want it to end! That would be so difficult to say goodbye to her again!

So Mom, if you can hear me, "Happy Birthday!" I love you so much and miss you more than I could even put into words. Now that I am a Mommy, I feel the pain of not having you in my life at such a deeper level. Sydney and I would have loved to have spent your special day with you today...I hope you heard us singing to you...

Who Knew?

Who knew how incredibly funny a nasal suction (buggy getter) could be? I mean if you think about it, the whole concept of it is pretty disgusting and quite traumatizing to many babies...but not my baby...

She had me in tears this morning. I was using the buggy getter and she started giggling. And not just once, but every time! I even had to call daddy and let me listen in. All three of us ended up laughing together! She is so funny!

Later in the day, we went to the grocery store. Once again, I had her in the baby Bjorn. She was getting to a point where she was done shopping so I was trying to keep her occupied by making speed boat noises which she was mimicking. She was really getting in to it and had drool everywhere, but she was smiling at the same time. I found myself laughing, not really paying attention to how silly we must of looked. When I finally did look around, I noticed several people watching us and smiling...I felt so lucky to be with Sydney!

Christmas Pictures

Merry Christmas to everyone! I don't know about all of you but Christmas was exhausting for me!! Sorry if I haven't called you yet, it's just been so busy. We had a very nice Christmas and felt so blessed to be spending it with Sydney. Below are some pictures to kind of give you a documentary of how we spent our holiday.

This was the day before Christmas Eve. Little Sydney in our rocking chair at 4.5 months old:

This next picture was taken Christmas Eve late morning. Greg took Zoey to work so Sydney, Ziggy and I went for a long walk using the new stroller. For the first time ever, Sydney relaxed in a stroller and fell asleep:

This next picture is from Christmas Eve. Aunt Peggy, Uncle Mike & Eric stopped over: (Notice the cute dress she has on that was cut off of our family Christmas cards!)

The last of these pictures are from Christmas morning:

After opening all of those presents, Daddy and Sydney needed a rest!! We then went to our friends Tom & Jamie's for the rest of Christmas Day!

Daddy and Sydney needed another rest!!

Sydney with her first dolly!

At the end of the night, we said a prayer and thanked God for our beautiful family and all of our blessings! It was the best Christmas ever!

My Little Buddy

Another busy day today! We went to Jamie's house and the kids exchanged Christmas gifts...Sydney's first Christmas gift. We then got pictures of Addison and Sydney together. They still don't really acknowledge each other yet. It's going to be so neat watching them grow up together.

Sydney doesn't take her long naps anymore. She now only takes 2 or 3 one hour naps a day. It doesn't help that I still have a terrible cough and end up waking her up all of the time. Greg and I are still struggling with our colds. Sydney just has a little cough, her cold didn't seem to progress thank God!

I am finally feeling more confident in being a mommy...it took awhile! As a result of feeling more confident, I now have more fun with Sydney and thoroughly enjoy everyday. She's my little buddy!

Our Funny Girl

Everyday with Sydney just brings me more joy. I love to walk around with her in her baby Bjorn. For the most part, she is such a happy baby and will frequently smile or talk to people as they pass by us. Today we went to the mall to finish some shopping and I could hear a children's choir so we decided to go check it out. I had Sydney in the baby Bjorn with her cute little Poo hat on. We walked up to the the choir as they sang and I held Sydney's hands in mine and we danced to the music. It didn't take long for Sydney to become the hit of the show. She was smiling from cheek to cheek and kicking her legs as the kids sang. Everyone around us was looking at Sydney and smiling...she brought holiday cheer to many, including me!

Moving on to a completely different topic, I am having a blast feeding Sydney her oatmeal cereal. I actually get a workout when we do it because I am constantly jumping up and down and making funny faces at Sydney so she opens her mouth and laughs! She opens her mouth and giggles as I put a spoon full of food in her mouth. She then holds her mouth open for a moment and gags. I then began jumping around again making funny faces and she then closes her mouth and swallows. It's very comical! Speaking of funny...Sydney is really starting to interact with us more. She has the cutest giggle! It's so cute that Greg and I will do almost anything to try and make her laugh. Man I love our little girl!!

Crazy Week at the Wade Residnece

Long week at the Wade residence!!

I came down with a terrible head cold early in the week and was so worried that I was going to give it to Sydney! As of today, I don't think I have.

I am always giving Greg kudos for helping out, but today, I am going to give myself Kudos...
I have felt so crappy all week, especially this weekend, but I was still able to keep up with Sydney and stay positive and playful with her, and I was still able to keep up with the laundry, house chores, grocery shopping, cooking, etc. Basically, I was super mom! I need to remember to recognize those things and give myself credit more often instead of focusing on all of the things that didn't get done! Today, I am feeling better and will be finishing up my Christmas shopping so as it all gets to everyone on time!

Sydney had her 4 month checkup on Friday. She is 26 inches tall (97th %), 15.5 pounds (90th %), and her head is a little on the small side due to its flattening on the back. I still do not understand why it is flat on the back because really the only time she is on her back is at bedtime. So, the doctor said its time to stop wrapping her and let her sleep freely so if she feels like rolling over she can (scary). He also said we should stop rocking her to sleep and that she needs to learn how to fall asleep on her own. I see many sleepless nights in our future. We decided not to implement all of this until next weekend since I have been so sick and need sleep right now. I don't know if I necessarily agree with the doctor on the whole wrapping thing...I have done a lot of research and there are proponents for both stances on wrapping...but, I do know that she needs to start sleeping in different positions so her head will round out some. I put her to sleep with her head to the side but she never keeps it there!

On a lighter note, the doctor said it was time to introduce solids...so we started with oatmeal cereal on Friday! She did really well...




The doctor said it may take a couple days before she learns to swallow...not our little one...she ate it up after a few gags and funny faces!!! In a couple weeks we will be introducing fruits and veggies. I am actually going to buy a food processor and make a lot of it on my own...anyone else out there try this? Any suggestions?

Unfortunately, since this was a 4 month checkup, Sydney also had to get some shots. She did pretty good, and daddy and I did pretty good. She did not take any naps that day and was a little cranky. They next day (yesterday) while mommy was feeling rotten, Sydney also felt icky and was running a fever...her first fever! I assumed it was due to her shots. I didn't panic...and handled it well. I just fed her more often to keep fluids coming in and cuddled with her and let her sleep on my chest. By bedtime, her fever was pretty much gone and she was sleepy.

After daddy finished up with his projects yesterday, he took over with Sydney so I could work on my own head cold for a couple hours. Daddy took over early evening until bedtime. With in that short period of time, Sydney peed on him twice, almost pooped on him once, and barfed on him a couple times...it was very eventful...

This would be the 2nd time she peed on him today...

This would be the poop that almost landed on daddy!!

That's it for now, I can't wait to see what's in store for us this week...

Our Big Saturday Night

Daddy and Sydney were being silly last night with her Luvy and BeBe Pod chair. She didn't even mind that she had something on her head!
Yesterday was a cold and rainy day. Sydney didn't even get out of her P.J.'s!!! We finally had to turn our heater on last night as her room was freezing! It got in the 40's (warm for you Minnesotans).

Greg and I had a good laugh last night. I put Sydney to bed around 8pm. While many of our friends were out for the night, Greg and I sat in and bowled on the Wii gaming system that we borrowed from friend. We truly have changed! By the way...I kicked Greg's butt!!

My Holiday Picture Nightmare

What started out to be a fun day ended up taking a very disappointing turn!!! I was finally able to get an appointment made for our first family holiday portrait for today. This was no easy task since Greg works all of the time and Jordan always has soccer. So, after getting everyone ready and working Sydney's feedings and naps around the appointment time, we finally arrived for our appointment. The first shots were to be of all of us and Sydney in her new Christmas dress. Sydney did awesome and smiled the whole time. The second round of shots were for her three month pictures. I changed her into another outfit and again, she smiled the whole time. We then went to go see Santa while the photographer was getting the pictures ready for us to view. We got cute pictures with Santa and then headed back to Sears for the picture preview. This is where things got bad...I didn't like ANY of the pictures she took. They were about as good as what I would have done. It really sucked and I wanted to cry. I really tried to like them but seriously, they were not done professionally. Only 1 had Sydney smiling which is ridiculous because she was seriously smiling the whole time...even the photographer said she was...so how did she not get it on film!!! Second, I had Sydney in her new dress which the photographer didn't even get on film. I mean come on, any professional photographer would know to get the damn dress in the photo and not just the babies head. And don't even get me started on the 3 month old shots of Sydney alone. They were so bad, I could of done it myself! So, I had a real problem...every other photo place was booked till Christmas and I needed the photo asap so I could get the cards done. So, I ended up having to pick a holiday picture that I did not like...I am pissed! When I told them I was not happy with any of the pictures, the photographer acted shocked. I will be taking her somewhere else to get the 3 month shots done. So, when you get our Holiday Christmas cards just know, I hate the picture too!!

Below are some pictures Greg and I took when we went to go see Santa...

Maybe I should become a photographer...I couldn't be any worse than the ones at Sears!!!

I did call and complain when I got home. They have someone from Human Resources calling me on Monday.

Sydney and I had to run errands today so she was in and out of the Baby Bjorn all afternoon. Its funny how many people approach us and talk to us. They always smile and comment on Sydney's beautiful eyes and her adorable smile. I love to show off my little one!

Along with completing errands, we also tried out our new jogging stroller (got a killer deal at Big Lots)! Mommy got an awesome run in while Sydney kicked back and enjoyed the view. Finally, a stroller she likes (at least for now). She really worked me too...towards the end of our run, I was tired and started walking. Well that was not acceptable to her, she began fussing. So I ran and she stopped fussing...stinker wasn't going to let me get off easy!!! Good news is that I am back to my pre-pregnancy weight. I tried on all of my pre-pregnancy jeans today and was pleasantly surprised when they all fit! Now I need to tone back up...that's the hard part.

Well, time for our evening routine of bath, food and rocking...

Sydney Updates

I've realized a spend a lot of time talking about sleep on my journal...this is because I am so sleep deprived!! I am going to try to stop doing that because it takes the focus away from all of the wonderful and beautiful experiences that I share with Sydney each day...

Sydney has the most beautiful blue eyes still. When I look down at her as I am feeding her and she catches my eyes, she stares at me with those big blue eyes and it just mesmerizes me. As this happens, I can actually feel joy spreading through my body..."this is my daughter!" It's very emotional for me.

And that smile of hers...I have the honor of seeing it from morning 'til night! She has even begun to giggle which makes the experience even that much more beautiful for us. I find myself doing the most goofiest things, at home and in public, just to see that smile. Talk about instant gratification!!!

Her favorite toy right now is "Luvy", a tag blankie that Laura & Jamie gave us. She goes nuts with this blankie and it actually calms her in the car. Speaking of, the car is not her favorite thing to do!!! Ear plugs would be nice! She also does not like her car seat, which is part of her stroller; therefore, walks in the stroller have not been an option for a few weeks. Thankfully, she does like the Baby Bjorn, so we are able to go for walks in it. All of our errands are also completed with the Baby Bjorn.

Sydney is a very active baby. She needs to be in constant motion and is not content with just sitting around. She always wants to be sitting or standing (with some assistance of course). She will tolerate tummy time as long as she has something to do! We still struggle some with nap time...she fights sleep. I have found that after some fussing in her swing, she will oftentimes fall asleep in it and then I take her out and hold her for the remainder of her nap. I have changed her bedtime so she now takes a shorter afternoon nap and then I start her bedtime routine earlier. It sucks for Greg because he doesn't get to see her anymore when he gets home from work; however, this new time gives me an hour or so of "me" time before going off to bed!

That's it for tonight ( I wrote this during my "me" time)! I am off to bed and hopefully, will only be up once throughout the night!

Best Daddy Award

Oofta, rough night last night! Little Sydney wasn't having anything to do with sleeping. I am not sure what was going on but she was awake from 11:30-4:30am this morning. Daddy finally brought her into bed with us and she slept soundly on her belly on Daddy's chest. This seems to be the only way we can get her to sleep soundly. She is such an active baby when she is awake and when she is asleep. The only way we can get her to sleep for long periods of time is if she is on her belly on our chest. I wish we could put her to sleep on her belly at nights...this would eliminate the whole swaddling thing which she gets out of in record speed anyways!!! Her Daddy is a champ. He has so much more patients with her at night than I do!! He stuck in there with her all night...I would feed her and he would attempt to get her back to sleep. He is literally going on maybe 3 hours of sleep today and he works 12 hours!!! I really could not do this parenting thing without him!!

We put up the Christmas tree yesterday...let me clarify that a little...Mommy put up the Christmas tree yesterday while Daddy worked on an electronics project and while Sydney slept in her swing. Oh well, at least we were all in the same room! I can't wait until she gets a little older and can help with the tree and we can start some fun traditions!! So much to look forward to...

Our Silly Girl

Last night Greg and I were giving Sydney her bath and ended up crying we were laughing so hard...Greg started squirting her with a little bath toy and she thought it was the funniest thing and was giggling and and kicking with her feet. By the time we were done with bath, the kitchen counter/sink was a wet mess!!! It was so precious! She is getting to be so funny...she blows bubbles, she fake coughs, she does a little motor boat sound with her lips, she talks and squeals, and that cheek to cheek smile is the most beautiful thing ever! What did we ever do for for a good laugh before Sydney?

Today is Christmas tree day...even Daddy is going to help!